Self control is so important... in so many ways... I'm surrounded by people who get hurt by looking for love or revenge in the wrong way... i find myself doing the same... differently, but the same. In the D-group I'm leading, our study last week was awesome. One of the things that stuck out to me were when he talked about "sin under the sin"... If I try to find value or significance in things like people complimenting me on how i look or smell or how well I do photography or whatever... then, the approval of others is obviously my idol... That's what i care about. I know that I spend more time thinking about or trying to improve the way people think about me... That's my idol... so in being selfish and vain, I'm also breaking the first commandment... Have no other gods before Me... so when we sin, just one sin, we're sinning at least twice. gosh... what a tangled web we weave... My GOD is forgiving, he offers me grace and mercy freely. I just have to accept it and not abuse it. You know what's cool? he gives us little gifts all the time. pursuing us like a guy does when he's in love with us and wants to marry us.... hahaha... (if you can imagine my tone of voice... it was funny) Our relationship with Christ is the ultimate cinderella story... although sometimes we try to play both role of the prince and cinderella... that never works out. you can' t be both... and role reversal doesn't work either... so really, we just need to relax, enjoy his gifts and blessings and enjoy him forever... sounds easy right? who wouldn't want that life... we all do, but what do we do all the time? all of us.. we all don't feel like hanging our with God every morning and then I forget during the day that he's here to help... to completely take my burdens... and I get distracted by all the material things in this world, and the things that i "need" ... and then i get stressed out because of school and work and emotions and friends and boys and love and non love and pressure and acceptance and all those things that everyone thinks they need to stress over this is supposed to be a run on sentence on purpose... now take a big breath and sigh saying, I don't have to worry about it. God's got it. He's got it under control... He's sitting right there all the time shaking his head, "HEY! you don't have to do that, i can help you , let me help you... I'm here to help you... please don't forget me. That's not going to make you happy forever, just today. remember me, remember my love for you..."

you know that song "Everything" by lifehouse? It's awesome. There's skits all over youtube. 

"How can I stand here with You and not be moved by You? You tell me, how could it be any better than this? 

Makes me weep every time i see the video... 

HELLOOoo WoRlD!

I'm using the font called Georgia... cuz That's where I'm from...  :)

This is my blog. I've just created it. Sometimes my thoughts are random... just single words. no sentences... I'm excited for when I have time to just sit down and think... because when I sit down to blog, it will prob. be an emotional time. I know this, I don't really know who I'm talking to... actually, I do. I'm talking to myself. Sometimes when I'm journaling, I realize things about myself that I didn't before. I'm excited to write more... Oh and I ask ppl sometimes, if they could describe me in one word, what would it be?... My favorite, I heard today. well, she's told me before, but i just forgot. Heather says I'm Rapturous. It's going to be incorporated into my tatoo... because I'm rapturous. and so was my mom. and so is my sister. hmmm. I want something involving me and my mom. she will be a daffodil. I'm not sure what I will be and I might want to add my sis in there. I think it will be cool. Maybe she will be a torch. a really pretty torch, a beautiful dancing torch. yes. that. so the torch and i will be wrapped up in the daffodil? no. uh, looking down on us. ug. not sure I'll play with it... but i know where i wana get it. i think.I'm excited. it's kinda my freedom tat. :) freedom from past relationships. Freedom from codependency, free. I'm free, it's my and Jesus and he's got my road laid down, So i don't have to lay it there. All i have to do is walk. Enjoy the scenery, find a grassy knoll and chill... sometimes storms will come and I have to sit there and rest in my faith and rest in my God while it's storming around me... But I'm free to do so. I don't have to create my river, trees, knoll, road, anything... He's got it taken care of.